There goes the franchise.

Hello everyone!

Now some people may have noticed that I haven’t written much recently due to the creation of my new blog: March of the Idiots  And the big move to Yorkshire!

For those of you who have ever been to Yorkshire, here is what it looks like: yorkshire

Of course the move has presented a rather large problem. What am I supposed to call myself now!?

Migration

The pack have just returned from their spring migration. The highlands of Scotland have a lot of food available at this time of year, and many packs journey to prey on wild haggis and shortbread. Unfortunatley such species are now becoming exctinct due to habitat loss and pollution.

What happend to day

Today i got a chistmas card … now we did horibell spelling be we said I was am making him lose the 

spelling test I said SHUT UP to him aparluntley an incult then I forgot it was lunch 

I was hungrey

 

 

Adverts I don’t get

Here are three adverts I don’t get. In oder of easiest to hardest to get.

  1. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DV2qiOeUT9E These adds are again, all a bit weird, but their supposed to be like that, it’s funny, but this ad is too subtle. It’s starts of with a beautiful mountain glen. The film is black and white and someone’s singing some sort of Scottish sounding folk song in the background. You see waterfalls and breezy hills, then an  old shepherd, he whistle and his faithful dog (whom I imagine is called shep or moss or bloop, or whatever sheepdogs are called.) answers him with a bark before he herds the sheep down the hill. Once penned in the sheep are sheared. While he is cutting the sheep’s wool the doy sniffs his master’s hand as he dozes by his side, waiting for when he is next needed, the picture of loyalty. The farmer continues cutting, then you get a shot of his firm but kind face looking down on the sheep who he’s shearing. Then he whistles again and the sheep rush out onto the mountain side, followed by the loyal dog. Then you rewind and notice that, if you examine it very closely the dog has had a haircut. Then the sign comes up: ‘Should have gone to specsavers.’ This is easy to get, but waay to subtle.
  2. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=quHUA3pZ7no I could only find this 4od ad on youtube, but trust me when I say this, they are all weird, this is the least weird one. Here are three described, including the one in the clip. a) A man walks up to one of those crisp and chocolate machines, you know, where you put in money and food comes out? Inside are people. Tiny, tiny people. Happily chatting and shouting catchphrases as they wait to (presumably) be devoured. Then a voice over talks about how 4od is a ‘vending machine full of your favourite shows!’ My questions about this one are, admittedly just about why these people are so happy! YOUR WAITING FOR DEATH AT THE HANDS OF A GIGANTIC (to you) CANIBAL AND YOU ARE SMILING AND CHATTING TO HIM AS HE PICKS WHICH ONE OF YOU WILL NOT LIVE TO SEE TOMMOROW!!!!! (!) It just goes downhill from here. Next is a short one. A guy is on an airplane and he is eating. He pulls the shrink wrap off his food and about a dozen tiny TV screens shoot out of his back like he’s inspector gadget or something! There are people on the screens all of them talking about how disgusting this guy’s (admittedly unappetising) dinner looks. Then a sign comes upi saying 4od, leaving the viewer wondering whether or not 4od is a surveillance copany or a bionic upgrade? The last one is the hardest to understand. A man is shooting clay pigeons, you know the game with the orange Frisbees and the guns? He’s shooting them and missing them all. The camera zooms in to show the names of, what I presume are, TV shows. He keeps missing until he picks up a new gun and shoots all of them down
  3. .http://www.youtube.com/watchv=H2fgQPzoI8Q . In case you don’t didn’t watch it I’ll explain as best I can. There’s this little cartoon space man on a drawing, he decides to go in a painting, so off he flies. Then he goes off to the stickers on the wall of a girls bedroom. he passes a lamp with a fairy on it. Fairy girl makes friendswith space man and they fly and run around the house, sliding down banisters and dancing on walls before settling down to watch TV. They sit in a picture on a cushion below some tree silhouttes. They hug and a sign comes up sating it’s an add for talk talk TV! Need I say more? Well I will. What has this to do with TV? Since when has meeting pretty girls who happen to live in your home but you’ve never met them before become to most important part of the TV expierence? Of course this is beside the point! After watching the ad I am clueless about what this thing is! Is it a brand of television? A recording thing like Tivo or Sky? A channel? I challenge any one in the comments to come up with an explanation for what this, this, this thing is!!!

Bye!

PS Sorry this one took a while!

I’m back with a vengance!

Keeping up with posts became stressful, so I took a long, long, long break! But know I’m back and here’s a few things rthat happened while I was away.

  • The summer holidays happened! Older readers may not have known this, however you may have noticed an increase of kids lying around.
  • Harry left. 😀
  • We haven’t moved yet. 😦
  • We went on holiday to France twice.
  • We went back to school. BOO! HISS! 😦

Oh well, life goes on! 🙂

Bye!

The mysterious case of the plaster cast mask.

On Monday we had art we were making plaster masks, we got a plastic mould and stuck plaster too it, I spent ages on mine, when Mr Move-it said we could work through break if we wanted I was the only one to take up the offer. Alone in the classroom I finished my mask and left it on the side to dry as I had no idea where I was supposed to put it (I’m not to good with stuff like that, memory like a sieve.)

Today I went looking for it. It wasn’t on the shelf, so I put my hand up and, after he’d yelled at me for daring to raise my hand (Now would be a good time to mention Mr Move-it’s personality. He sees himself as God! But he isn’t. For instance, he’ll talk about how “There’s no right or wrong in art, mistakes are okay…  then he yells at you in front of the whole class for making the slightest error! Bryony says she’s not going to take art for GCSE simply because she can’t stand him!) he plonked a mask in front of me and told me to start. Thinking he didn’t understand I asked him if I couldn’t find my original mask, just as a little hint. He said, and I quote:

“Not my problem! Get off your backside and look for it!”

I looked around, but nothing, then I heard him talking to some other students

“Put your name on it [the mask] or you’ll get what I’ve dubbed [insert my name] syndrome” he looked directly at me “You didn’t put your name on it and as I dramatically demonstrated [earlier with an old mask] anything without a name on it goes in the bin!”

So he as good admitted he’d thrown away my work, and proved that he knew it was my work! How did he know? Well, apart from the fact that it was the only one there, it did have my name on it! Bryony witnessed me putting it on!

Now with someone as critical as Mr Move-it you sometimes get the feeling he wants to destroy your work, I was using tequniques (tekneeks) I hadn’t been taught, it did look a bit messy, I think the temptation just got to strong and he threw it away! (Either that or the label fell off. But then why didn’t it happen anybody elses?)

I’ll get my own back though! He’ll rrue the day he crossed me when he sees my new mask! A caricature of him as an owl! 😈

Bye! 🙂