I eat boiled eggs in my lunch box.
Are you shocked? Are you repulsed? Probably not.
But the kids at my school are.
Here is a picture of a boiled egg:
The colour of the yolk seems to disturb people most. After you boil an egg and let it go cold the yolk goes from yellow to greyish.
If you’re an adult you may have had one of these in your lunch, along with every kid at your school. But if you’re a kid suffering through what I’m going through here are some eggstremely (eggstremley, extremley, geddit?) useful retorts for common taunts. (You can judge for yourself if I’ve tried any of these.
Taunt: You can’t eat eggs if your a vegetarian, now you’re eating a baby chick!!! 😆
Retort: These eggs have not been fertelised, there is as much cance of a bird dropping out of them as there is one dropping out of you.
Taunt: Do you actually eat eggs?
Retort: You mean you’ve never eaten any eggs at all! In any shape or form? Ever? Wierdo! (No offense to vegans.)
Taunt: Urrgh! That egg really smells!
Retort: Funny, it smelled in here before I got my egg out. Coincidentally the smell started up when you came in. 🙂
Taunt: Are you actually gonna eat that?
Retort: No I just brought it in to look at while I eat my sandwiches as I’m not allowed to bring in a portable television.
Taunt: Is that egg raw?
Retort: Yes I’m going to eat it after I chow down on my entire raw cow leg that my Mum packs for me every day.
Taunt: Cool is that an egg *gathers round to watch*
Retort: Roll up! Roll up! See a girl eat her lunch!
Taunt: That egg really stinks!
Retort: I’m a vegetarian. It’s my only source of protein. Though my egg may smell the smell of my dead body when I die from lack of protien will be worse!
That’s all I can think of for now.
I hope you found this post Eggciting to the eggstreme! (Better stop before I break my funny bone and have to have an eggs-ray!!!)
And that’s my cue to eggsit!