Lights, Action, Jonah!

Today in quest we did acting, we had to pick a bible story and act it out. We chose Jonah and the whale, but Sarah seemed to think we didn’t know the story, so just to show her we did the entire story, every single bit! So without further ado, here is the story of Jona and the Whale!

(Scene: Sarah’s living room)

God (Lauren): Jonah you must go to Nineveh and convert them to Christianity!

Johnah(me): No. (pouting) Don’t want to. (He (she) tiptoes away and curls up into a ball) God’ll never find me in this ship’s hold!

Sailors(Lauren and Annie): Help! Help! There’s  a storm!  (They throw things over board.)

Jonah: Wait! Wait! Something you should know, I happen to be in an arguement with God.

Sailor (Annie): Well that’s helpful. (They throw him over board. He screams and is swallowed up by a huge whale (Annie) He kneels down and prays.)

Jonah: God, consider your point proven, I’m inside a whale!

God: You must think about what you’ve done. (Narrating)  For forty days and forty nights Jonah prayed, then the whale sicked him up.

(Whale makes discusting sick noises and Jonah falls out of his mouth.)

Jona (rubbing his hands on his clothes): Ewww, I’m covered in whale spit!

God: Jonah go to Nineveh!

(Jonah goes to Nineveh.)

Ninevites (Annie and Lauren): Down with Christianity! Down with Christianity!

Jonah: Hey! Something you should know! od plans to send firey boulders from the sky to crush your town.

Ninavite: How do we prevent this?

Jonah: By being baptised! (They dunk their heads into a bowl)

Jonah (to God): So God, when are you going to send down the firey boulders and plagues of alligators?

God: They are Christians, There is no need to.

Jonah: You see this is why I didn’t want to come! I’m going to sit in the desert under that tree and sulk. (The tree sways in the breeze, God points a finger at it and it withers and dies.)

Jonah: Hey, I liked that tree.

God: But it was not yours, bwhereas the people of Nineveh are mine, and I can convert them if I want.

Jonah: I understand.

The End.

This is pretty much how it happened. Pretty good for a play performed by three actors with only imaginary props!



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