Today I went to Bath fashion museum, some of the costumes were boring, some were beautiful and some were ridiculous.
After we’d dressed up in some Victorian clothes (Mum managed to look like a Victorian lady, whilst I looked like an eight year old, problem is, adults never wear dresses like Victorian times any more, but young children wear them all the time.) After that it got boring, until we saw the more ‘modern’ fashions.
Like the ‘glamour’ section, including a mini dress so short you’d probably be arrested if you wore it without tights (seriously, it was basically a smock top, you could even call it a T-shirt) and a weird brown hairy thing that rather than giving the desired impression from a glamorous dress (i.e “I’m so posh, rich and beautiful”) this dress was saying “Ug me cave man, me kill bear make dress.”
Then there was the dress that was basically a towel with a broche in it. You couldn’t call it a dress, a dress needs more cloth, the mannequin wearing it was basically naked. Can I just pause and say something about mannequins.
On my travels I have discovered that there is a big difference between French and English mannequins, English mannequins are sloppy, they hardly ever even have heads, or if they do the features aren’t often painted and they have no skin colour. The french, however, have mastered the art. Skin colour, eye colour, realistic hair, sometimes even eye lashes! Sometimes, I’ve been walking down a French street and seen a mannequin standing outside a shop and thought it was a child!
Anyway, we also saw a dress that looked like someone had made a beautiful dress out of paper, left it in the rain, dried it on a radiator and put it on all ripped and grey and crumpled. And two dresses with such long dangling sleeves that they reminded us of batman, I can only imagine the adverts when those dresses came out “Buy our dresses, not onlly do you look good, but if you run fast enough you will fly!” Then there was a big pinkish purple one that (due to the make of the dress or shape of the mannequin I do not know) made the wearer look like a giant prune
Then there were the two funny manequins, one of them looked like Snow White, and one was bald with curly tufts growing like mushrooms out of his head. He was dressed in a red and black jacket with red trousers, so he looked like a villain from a movie.
But I have been saving the best ’till last. The wierdest most ridiculous costume is something I like to call: Big cheif silly dress.
She has a wierd black thing on her head that looks like a native American Headress, it’s either part of the costume or something went really wrong when they were making this mannequins hair!
She wears a green jacket, which hangs open to show her leopard skin bra, her trousers are dark blue with gold stars!
If you don’t believe me then why not visit the museum of fashion in bath.